What Type of Therapist Is Best for Couples Therapy? A Guide to Finding a Couples Therapist in New Jersey

The best therapist for couples therapy is a licensed mental health professional with specialized training in a structured, research-based couples approach, such as the Gottman Method, Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, or Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO). The license tells you a therapist is qualified to practice. The couples training tells you they know how to work with two people and the relationship between them, which is a very different skill from individual therapy.

If you are searching “what kind of therapist should we see for marriage problems” or “couples therapist near me in NJ,” this guide walks you through the credentials, approaches, and questions that matter most, so you and your partner can choose with confidence.

Why Couples Therapy Needs a Specialized Therapist

Couples therapy is not simply individual therapy with two people in the room. The “client” is the relationship itself: the patterns, the communication cycles, and the emotional bond between partners. A skilled couples therapist keeps sessions balanced so neither partner feels blamed, slows down conversations that usually escalate, and helps both people understand what is happening underneath the conflict.

A therapist without couples training may be excellent with individuals but can unintentionally side with one partner, let arguments repeat in session, or focus on venting rather than change. That is why the type of couples training a therapist has makes such a meaningful difference.

Step 1: Look for the Right License

In New Jersey, several types of licensed professionals can provide couples therapy:

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT): A clinician whose graduate training centers on relationships and family systems.
Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW): A master’s-level clinician licensed for independent clinical practice, with training in mental health, family systems, and the social context of a person’s life.
Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC): A master’s-level counselor licensed for independent practice in mental health counseling.
Licensed Psychologist (PhD or PsyD): A doctoral-level clinician who provides therapy and psychological assessment.

No single license is automatically “best” for couples therapy. An LCSW or LPC with advanced couples training may be far better suited to relationship work than a clinician with a different license and no couples specialization. What matters most is the next step.

Step 2: Look for Training in a Couples Therapy Model

This is where couples therapists truly differ from one another. Well-established couples approaches include:

The Gottman Method

Developed by Drs. John and Julie Gottman from decades of research observing real couples, the Gottman Method gives partners practical tools to manage conflict, build friendship and appreciation, and repair after arguments. It is well known for identifying the “Four Horsemen” (criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling) and teaching healthier alternatives.

Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples

EFT focuses on the emotional bond between partners. It helps couples recognize the negative cycle they get caught in, such as one partner pursuing while the other withdraws, and understand the deeper needs for connection and security underneath it. As those needs are expressed more openly, partners often feel closer and safer with each other.

Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO)

IFIO applies Internal Family Systems (IFS) to couples. It helps each partner notice the protective “parts” that show up during conflict, such as the part that criticizes or the part that shuts down, and speak for those parts instead of from them. This can turn heated exchanges into more honest, compassionate conversations.

DBT Skills for High-Conflict Couples

For couples whose arguments escalate quickly, Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills offer concrete tools for emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and effective communication, helping both partners stay steady during difficult conversations.

Mindfulness and Mind-Body Approaches

When conflict heats up, the body reacts with a racing heart, tight chest, or a mind that goes blank. Mindfulness and breath-based practices help partners notice when they are becoming overwhelmed and calm down before continuing a hard conversation.

Step 3: Check How Advanced the Training Is

Couples training varies widely. A clinician may attend a single introductory workshop and list “couples therapy” on their profile, while another may complete multiple levels of training in a specific model. When reviewing a couples therapist’s profile, look for a named model (Gottman, EFT, IFIO) rather than a general phrase like “relationship issues.”

Signs Couples Therapy Could Help

People often begin searching for a couples therapist when they notice patterns like these:

The same arguments repeat without being resolved
One partner pursues and the other withdraws
Small issues quickly escalate into big fights
You feel more like roommates than partners
Trust has been damaged, or there has been a betrayal
You are facing a big change, such as a new baby, a move, a job change, or an empty nest
You have stopped talking about things that matter
You love each other but no longer feel close

You do not need to wait for a crisis. Many couples begin therapy simply wanting to communicate better and strengthen their connection.

Questions to Ask a Potential Couples Therapist

Are you licensed in New Jersey? Look for a state license such as LMFT, LCSW, LPC, or a licensed psychologist.
What specific couples therapy model are you trained in, and how advanced is that training?
How do you keep sessions balanced so neither partner feels blamed?
Will we learn practical skills, or will sessions mostly be talking about the past?
What happens if only one partner is ready to start?
Do you offer telehealth? Online sessions can make it much easier for busy couples to attend together.

A good couples therapist will welcome these questions and answer them clearly.

Couples Therapy at Light Street Psychotherapy in Short Hills, NJ

At Light Street Psychotherapy in Short Hills, New Jersey, couples therapy is offered by licensed clinicians, each trained in a distinct, structured couples approach. That means couples can be matched with the method that best fits their relationship.

Gina Totino, LCSW: EFT, IFIO and DBT for High-Conflict Couples

License: Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), licensed in New Jersey and Florida
Education: BA, Washington University in St. Louis; Master of Social Work with Honors, Rutgers University
Couples training: Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples; Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO); DBT for high-conflict couples
Role: Partner, Light Street Psychotherapy
Best fit for: Couples caught in escalating conflict or a pursue-withdraw cycle who want to rebuild emotional safety

Hunter Tarvin, LCSW: Gottman Method

License: Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), New Jersey
Education: Master of Social Work, New York University
Couples training: Gottman Method for Couples Therapy
Additional credential: Registered Yoga Teacher (RYT-200), bringing mindfulness and breath-based practices into sessions
Best fit for: Couples who want practical, research-based communication and conflict tools

Meredith Strauss, LCSW: IFIO (IFS for Couples)

License: Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), licensed in New Jersey and Florida
Education: BA, Washington University in St. Louis; Master of Social Work with Honors, Rutgers University
Couples training: Trained in Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO); IFS Level 3 Certified
Role: Founder, Light Street Psychotherapy
Best fit for: Couples whose conflicts are shaped by past hurts, trauma, or deep emotional patterns

The team meets regularly to discuss cases, so couples benefit from the insight of an entire clinical team, not just one therapist.

Frequently Asked Questions

What type of therapist is best for couples therapy? A licensed clinician, such as an LMFT, LCSW, LPC, or psychologist, with specialized training in a structured couples approach like the Gottman Method, Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT), or Intimacy from the Inside Out (IFIO).

Is a marriage counselor the same as a couples therapist? The terms are often used interchangeably. What matters most is the therapist’s license and specific training in a couples therapy model, not the title.

What if only one partner wants to go to couples therapy? It is common for one partner to feel more ready than the other. A consultation can help clarify options, and individual sessions can still create meaningful change in a relationship.

Is there a couples therapist in Short Hills, NJ? Yes. Light Street Psychotherapy in Short Hills, New Jersey, offers couples therapy with Gina Totino, LCSW (EFT, IFIO, DBT for high-conflict couples), Hunter Tarvin, LCSW (Gottman Method), and Meredith Strauss, LCSW (IFIO).

Can couples therapy be done online? Yes. Couples therapy can be provided effectively through secure telehealth, which makes it easier for busy partners to attend together. Light Street Psychotherapy offers telehealth throughout New Jersey, and Gina Totino and Meredith Strauss also see clients in Florida.

Visit Our Short Hills, NJ Office or Connect by Telehealth

Light Street Psychotherapy sees couples at our Short Hills, New Jersey office, with telehealth available throughout the state, including Millburn, Springfield, Maplewood, South Orange, Summit, Madison, Chatham, Livingston, Florham Park, Westfield, Cranford, Whippany, Berkeley Heights, Union, Scotch Plains, Morristown, New Providence, and Mountainside.

Contact: (973) 544-8617 | Book a free consultation

Looking for a licensed, specially trained therapist? Learn about couples counseling in New Jersey with our team in Short Hills.