What Is Trauma? Signs, DBT, EMDR & EFT Therapy Explained

Trauma and emotional distress can show up in many different ways — in our relationships, our bodies, our thoughts, and the patterns we repeat without realizing it. If you’ve searched “what is trauma,” “signs of trauma,” or “what is DBT/EMDR therapy,” this guide answers those questions in plain language.

Light Street Psychotherapy is a trauma therapy practice located in Short Hills, NJ, offering in-person and telehealth sessions across New Jersey and Florida. You can reach us at 📞 (973) 544-8617 or ✉️ meredithstrausssocialworker@gmail.com.

What Is Trauma?

Trauma is the emotional and psychological response to an event — or a series of events — that overwhelms a person’s ability to cope. It isn’t only about what happened; it’s about how the nervous system processed it. Trauma can come from a single incident, like a car accident, or from ongoing experiences, like a difficult childhood environment.

What Are the Signs of Trauma?

Common signs of unresolved trauma include:

• Feeling on edge or easily startled
• Avoiding certain places, people, or memories
• Emotional numbness or disconnection
• Difficulty trusting others or feeling safe
• Physical symptoms like tension, fatigue, or trouble sleeping

Common sources of trauma include:

• Traumatic car accidents
• Medical trauma
• Childhood developmental or attachment trauma
• Difficult or painful relationship dynamics

How our therapists help: At Light Street Psychotherapy in Short Hills, NJ, Gina Totino, LCSW works with clients navigating traumatic car accidents, medical trauma, and childhood developmental or attachment trauma, helping them process these experiences and rebuild a sense of safety and clarity.

What’s the Difference Between Guilt and Shame?

These two emotions are often confused, but they work very differently in the mind:

• Guilt says, “I did something bad.” It’s tied to a specific action and can motivate repair.
• Shame says, “I am something bad.” It’s tied to identity and tends to make people withdraw or shut down.

Learning to tell the two apart is often a turning point in therapy, because guilt can be resolved, while unexamined shame tends to quietly drive anxiety, people-pleasing, or self-criticism.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW helps clients foster emotional clarity around guilt versus shame, and envy versus jealousy, so they can respond to their emotions with curiosity instead of judgment.

What Is DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)?

DBT is a structured, skills-based therapy that helps people manage intense emotions, tolerate distress, and improve relationships. It’s especially effective for anyone who feels like their emotions swing quickly or intensely, or who struggles with conflict in close relationships.

DBT typically focuses on four skill areas:

1. Mindfulness
2. Distress tolerance
3. Emotion regulation
4. Interpersonal effectiveness

There’s also a specialized application: DBT for high-conflict couples, which helps partners de-escalate arguments and communicate without shutting down or blowing up.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in DBT and DBT for high-conflict couples, helping individuals and partners build the skills to respond to conflict and big emotions with more steadiness.

What Is EMDR Therapy?

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a trauma-focused therapy that helps the brain reprocess distressing memories so they no longer feel as overwhelming. Using guided eye movements or other forms of bilateral stimulation, EMDR helps “unstick” memories that the nervous system has stored as unresolved threat.

It’s widely used for:

• Single-incident trauma (accidents, medical events)
• Complex or childhood trauma
• Anxiety linked to specific memories or triggers

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in EMDR and uses it to help clients process traumatic car accidents, medical trauma, and other distressing memories that continue to affect daily life.

What Is Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for Couples?

EFT is a couples therapy approach built on the idea that most relationship conflict is really about unmet emotional needs — for closeness, reassurance, or safety — that get expressed as arguments, distance, or shutdown. EFT helps couples slow down, understand the emotion underneath the conflict, and reconnect.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples, helping partners move past repetitive conflict cycles and rebuild emotional connection.

What Does “IFS-Informed” Couples Therapy Mean?

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a model that views the mind as made up of different “parts” — protective parts, wounded parts, and a core calm “Self.” In an IFS-informed couples approach (sometimes called Intimacy from the Inside Out), each partner learns to recognize which “part” of them shows up during conflict, rather than reacting from that part automatically.

This helps couples fight less about the surface issue and more directly address what’s really going on underneath.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in IFS-informed couples therapy (Intimacy from the Inside Out), helping partners understand their own reactive patterns and communicate from a calmer, more grounded place.

What Is Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping)?

Emotional Freedom Technique, often called “tapping,” is a body-based approach that combines gentle tapping on specific acupressure points with focused attention on a distressing thought or feeling. It’s used to reduce the intensity of anxiety, stress, or traumatic memories in the moment.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping), offering clients an additional body-based tool for managing anxiety and emotional overwhelm between sessions.

What Is Interpersonal Process Therapy (IPT)?

IPT is an approach that uses the relationship between client and therapist as a live example of a person’s relationship patterns. Instead of only talking about relationships, clients get real-time insight into how they connect, communicate, and sometimes get stuck — right there in the room.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW is trained in Interpersonal Process Therapy, helping clients build self-awareness around their relational patterns and translate that insight into healthier connections outside of therapy.

What Is Solution-Focused Short-Term Therapy?

Not every concern requires years of therapy. Solution-focused short-term therapy is a goal-oriented approach that concentrates on identifying what’s working, building on existing strengths, and making concrete progress in a shorter timeframe.

How our therapists help: Gina Totino, LCSW offers solution-focused short-term therapy for clients who want focused, practical support for a specific challenge.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do I need a trauma diagnosis to start therapy? No. Many people come to therapy for stress, relationship conflict, or emotional overwhelm without a formal trauma diagnosis, and still benefit from these approaches.

How do I know which approach is right for me? Every client’s needs are different. Many therapists — including Gina Totino, LCSW — draw from multiple trained modalities (DBT, EMDR, EFT, IFS-informed work) and tailor the approach to the individual or couple in front of them, rather than using a one-size-fits-all method.

Is this therapy available in person or online? Light Street Psychotherapy offers both in-person and telehealth sessions across New Jersey, with telehealth also available in Florida.

Where is Light Street Psychotherapy located? Light Street Psychotherapy is located in Short Hills, NJ, serving Millburn, Springfield, Maplewood, South Orange, Summit, Madison, Chatham, Livingston, Florham Park, Westfield, Cranford, Whippany, Berkeley Heights, Union, Scotch Plains, Morristown, New Providence, and Mountainside, with telehealth also available in Florida.

Ready to Take the Next Step?

If any of these approaches resonate with what you’re going through, reach out to Light Street Psychotherapy to schedule a free consultation and start your healing journey.

Light Street Psychotherapy 📍 Short Hills, NJ 📞 (973) 544-8617 ✉️ meredithstrausssocialworker@gmail.com

If you are in crisis or experiencing a life-threatening emergency, please call 911 immediately.